To Mr. H

Dear Sir,

I am writing to inform you that contrary to popular human belief, we don't prefer peanut butter to cheese. This may be true in California, but in this geographical area, no self-respecting Wisconsinite would prefer an appetizer of peanut butter to a fragrant, wedge of blue, cheddar, or brick.

If you'd be so kind as to stock your little contraptions with some fromage, me and mine will make a concerted effort to throw ourselves on this:

Or this:



P.S. Genetically speaking, my kin and I are also allergic to nuts.  I thought you should know.

Cordially Yours,

Curtis P. Mousewitch